Meditation Day 2: Unconditional Inner Peace (August 4, 2025)
What is unconditional inner peace? This was the question I asked my teacher and guide, Micky, when we first met. He didn’t like the term “enlightenment” as it has so many different meanings that have been attached to it from so many diverse meditation teachings. The biggest misnomer, from his perspective, is the “white light” experience. Having an expectation of what enlightenment is, means and what you’ll experience when you “achieve it” can often be the very thing that keeps someone from acknowledging their progress and even their own stated desired outcomes.
Unconditional Inner Peace
So, instead, Micky prefers to use the term, “Unconditional Inner Peace” as it leaves far less up to interpretation. Do a quick Google Search of the term and you’ll get this summary result:
Unconditional inner peace is a state of deep calm, acceptance, and contentment that exists independently of external circumstances. It's characterized by self-compassion, self-acceptance, and a sense of wholeness that doesn't rely on external validation. Cultivating unconditional inner peace involves practices like mindfulness, self-love, and forgiveness.
It might be helpful if I go back just a bit further and share why I want this fo rmyself. When I became sober with the support of Alcoholics Anonymous (including my sponsor and home group in Manhasset, New York) I began living the Serenity Prayer:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
Those 27 words can be a prayer. OR, those same 27 words can be a simple and effective path towards attaining serenity (which I could also call “inner peace”) simply by practicing them in every moment of every day. When anything happens, rather than being in reaction to an outside stimulus, I can simply ask myself, “Is this something for me to accept? Or is this something inviting me to have the courage to change?” And, the beauty is that when I inevitably get it wrong, I grow wiser with the third part of the prayer, “…and the wisdom to know the difference.” How do you gain said wisdom? By failing utterly and attempting to change that which must be accepted or accepting that which I must have the courage to change.
From Serenity to Unconditional Inner Peace
As I continued my own practice of serenity, my life changed for the better and significantly so. Not just in my sobriety (I am currently 867 days sober), but also in every other facet of life. I became clear that through this simple process of “accept” or “change” and the powerful lessons that unfolded when I got it wrong was teaching me how to be a peace with, well, everything.
I began using an app called Insight Timer and if you’re not already using it I highly recommend it. Start with the free version — it’s incredible and has everything you need to get started in meditation. I began tracking my daily meditation practice and saw that I was building consistency.
Then, I noticed a good friend of my from my karate studio had changed for the better. I used to experience her as constantly stressed out, but I started noticing that she was calm and peaceful. I asker her what had changed. She hadn’t noticed the level of shift that I had witnessed and appreciated me telling her so. She shared the work she was doing with Micky and I asked for an introduction.
I’ve been working with Micky now for just under a year. Having a teacher to talk through challenges and growth spurts is so helpful. My foundational practices in Positive Intelligence and a prior year focused on the Serenity Prayer most certainly helped me get a jump start on my own inner peace.
“Unconditional” Inner Peace
Where Micky has been guiding me is from a foundation of inner peace to the broader context of “unconditional” inner peace. That is, inner peace without any conditions and not diminished by outside circumstance. For the most part, I feel like I’ve been trending in that direction and occasionally find the upper limits of where my desire for unconditional inner peace is challenged (and shows me I still have a ways to go).
And so here I am spending the week with Micky deepening my practice. What’s important to note is that all of this effort is not just to achieve unconditional inner peace. My own attainment of unconditional inner peace is in the service of a larger objective that both Micky and I share: Unbound Compassion.
Unbound Compassion
I’ll say more about this in a future post as I do deeper work in this area, but it helped me to hear Micky’s story. Once he had achieved unconditional inner peace (and most would call that “enlightenment”) he enjoyed this new found freedom and joy in his own life. But after a short time, it became apparent that unconditional inner peace, while certainly a preferable way to live life was missing something. Specifically, a desire to help others with the same thing.
Compassion can mean different things to different people and can have very different motivations behind why a person chooses to be compassionate. Without attaining unconditional inner peace, for example, a drive for compassion could be done from a place of stress, frustration, and even anger and resentment. A desire to “look good” might be a motivation to be seen as someone who has deep compassion.
None of that is necessarily “bad”, but it’s important to understand that for most people there are limits to their compassion. For example, I might only wish to share compassion with those who “deserve it.” Or I might say I could never be compassionate to someone who commits murder, adultery or abuse.
Unbound Compassion is different. It’s compassion for all beings and without limit (hence, “unbound”). Once a person has unconditional inner peace, the next step will likely be Unbound Compassion. I see this in Micky and I see this in myself. Today, I know there are limits to my own compassion. My compassion is not yet “unbound” but I can see a path to get there and I’m excited to continue my journey.
If you’ve made it this far, you’re intrigued with these ideas and likely have questions. I understand. That’s one of the reasons I’ve spent about an hour or so with Micky every week for the past year and now have the distinct pleasure of meeting with him twice a day every day this week. I’ll do my best to pass on what I’m learning with an understanding that this is a vicarious approach and lacks the direct observation and experience I have the benefit of receiving through this week-long journey. Be that as it may, I’m happy to keep sharing and surfacing these concepts as a means to pass on what I’m learning as it is happening. I see this sharing as part of my journey towards unbound compassion. And that’s just it — a journey, not a destination. I’m enjoying the process as I learn and grow.